“Yo mama is so ugly even the whomping willow wouldn’t hit that.”
someone who should probably be my friend because I LOLed when I read it. (via hello-my-name-is-kristen)
[seductively takes off glasses]
wow you’re fucking blurry
the day someone looks at you and thinks “wow I could marry her”
run. really fast.
have you ever seen someone’s face and just wanted to look at them forever
the chicken wanted to sound different so it had to think outside of the bawks